Here Goes


Here goes!!    


I hate writing. Hate it. It sucks major ass. Every time I sit down to write anything, my body instantly convinces me that I need to pee, or that something in the other room requires my attention. I begin to break out in a cold sweat and my mind starts racing around. I hate writing poems, prose, essays, Facebook updates, shopping lists...for some reason my body always reacts negatively towards it.

So naturally, I've decided to start a blog. Because I am a sadomasochist and I have this romanticized view of being a tortured soul writing witty life changing  essays and stories on the human condition all the while my 74 year old dog sits in the corner looking forlorn and I'm slowly drowning in rum and loose women come through my revolving door of love, while I await the one. And I don't even drink (that much) or believe in the one, but it's my semi-fantasy and it doesn't have to make sense. 
The dream




The reality..the oh so sad reality
 

ANYWAY>>This blog will be a display of the random and not so random thoughts that run through my brain from time to time from the serious to the absurd. An exposure of the musings that seem to make so much sense in my head, till I decide to put them in print. Till I'm forced to account for them.

I will write when I'm inspired and when I'm uninspired. When I'm feeling funny or when I'm feeling lousy or worse, when I think I'm funny but I'm just sad. From politics to that shit you find on under your toe nails, I'm going to write. Write write write..because I need to. My body needs to get used to the pain of knowing that my thoughts are now in print, that others can mock and laugh and agree and wipe their ass with them.

Why?Because I have the urge to write. To speak about things as I see them. The need to get it out. The need to have my voice heard..the need to call people douche bags and the need to make people laugh. I'm a needy bastard on the inside, but I know it..and I'm embracing it ..so sit back and enjoy..and be patient..at least one of these will be good..

Peaaaccceeee

(I'm working on a sign out that won't be so cringe-worthy)




















 

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